BEN’S BLOG: Dad, I’ve just found another…

About ten minutes ago, I stood up and made my way along the aisle to go to the toilette. As I got there, I looked up, and another passenger had just beat me to it. To my right, the air-hostess looked at me and clicked her fingers, shook her head, and said ‘Shuckz, better luck next time…’.

Man, I just llluuurrrvvvee Americans. So let’s get it onnn!!!

In seven hours and ten minutes, The Starship will be landing in my favourite place in the World. A place where you don’t have to be half embarrassed or ashamed about trying to get ahead and better yourself a bit, where they erase threats rather than pander to and dance around them, where you have to pay for yourself rather be a spoilt English whitey, where they share a dream to be the best, and get to the top, rather than settle for a Prezzo standard of mediocrity, the place where Gordon Gekko was given a second chance and made a big comeback, and holier-than-thou middle-class-lefties are brushed aside rather than cowered to. Yes, Blog, in about seven hours now, The Starship will be landing, for the first time, making its dayboo, in Nooh York; The Land of The Free.

I have been invited, with Belindabelle, to go and visit Pam Statements’ family in Minnesota, and attend the much anticipated wedding of her sister; the beautiful Patty. Just to make it easy; I asked Pam to book all of this up, with other little excursions whilst there, also going to New York and Las Vegas, business class, changing-up and having US Dollars delivered to me, all about three days before leaving.

I am most looking forward to being reunited with my American Not-Staff, brother-in-arms; John Herou; father of the world’s greatest living being (now that our finest leader has retired to the dog-track in the sky); Pam Statements. Before seeing him though, I will be spending three days taking over New York; changing, flagrantly ignoring, and denying all anti-bookmaking laws whilst there, having a business summit/lunch with Gordon Gekko to discuss the latest moves with Annacotte Steel, and also having a photo next to his bull statue.

In Other News:

My rotund blubber is lying flat back along the seat. I’ve just eaten a huge three-course-meal and there’s a screen in front of me that must have a choice of over a hundred films to watch; to make a change and get myself in the mood, I think I’m going to watch ‘Wall Street’. And due to being a fidgety and unbearably restless flier, I have taken a Diazapam that’s now kicking in nicely. Life is good, and believe me; Business Class = Different Class.

This blog sends lots of love and hugs to the Male Dept, of The Elderly and Infirm. My dad is a walking encyclopedia of ailments and illnesses, and he hasn’t been a well boy of late. He is everything I am not; content, rested, rounded, subtle, and of a forever gentle and unassuming nature. It was him though, that got me started on my road of entrepreneurialism. When I was six or seven years old, we used to put some bacon in the slow oven, overnight, on a Saturday night. We’d then get up before six ‘o clock the following morning, make a bacon sandwich, and head of to the nearest golf course, where I would jump in and out of bushes looking for lost balls…to then sell back to the members in the car-park at 50p a go. Happy times, Dad. And many more to come…

I’m looking up and the film’s just got to the bit where Bud Fox is trying to break through with Gekko’s secretary, in order to meet the main-man himself. I’ve been there a million times myself, with the likes of The Baron, Mr E, and The Dark Knight. ‘Well, life comes down to a few moments, and here is one of them.’

See you in New York,

Ben x