BEN’S BLOGS: ‘Norman Mander – in hiding at the hands of The Slovenlies.’

 [dropcap]H[/dropcap]aving been an employer for the last fifteen years, I have been ground-down and dehumanised, into believing the following:

1) It’s okay to be late for something if, at the last minute, on your arrival, you make a rushed-face and slightly out-of-breath-voice. “There was traffic in central London.”

2) Having spent thousands of pounds, and hundreds of man hours, on Cheltenham preparations and promotions, it’s competent practise, to leave a big pile of filled-out account-application-forms, on the side, for several days, and not post the new-account packs, until the first morning of the festival. “Sorrrreeeeeeeyyyy.”

3) Be slovenly, and leave at home, the slide in signs, used on the pitch, that display minimum-bet and each-way terms. “Don’t worry about it. No one will notice.”

4) It’s good for the image of the company, to write white-boards up, with slantey-writing, and do fry-up café style, zig-zag bubbles, around the special offers or markets we are betting on. (Also, don’t use lots of different colours and lay it out nicely, as the human eye certainly wouldn’t be attracted to that.) “You’re fussy and you always go on and on about it.”

Like a lifer, before the parole-board, after my fifteen year stretch, I accept it. The defiance I once had, now beaten. I agree that the unacceptable is acceptable. I have been fully re-socialised, and see the world with the same eyes as those, who have the power to free me.

Oh Blog, oh Blog, myself and Gaul Wood had dinner, at Rules, with one of the dinosaurs last night though. Don’t tell anyone. Don’t let the Staff Parole-Board find out, or I’ll have to stay for another fifteen years. Let this just be our little secret…

I take this opportunity; to celebrate the career of Norman Mander. Now 67 years of age, having owned Backhouse Racing, that then merged with Bet365, Norman went on to run, the great Bet365’s, on-course and mobile/hospitality-betting. I have known Norman from when I was thirteen years old, and he has always been a fine example. I was very annoyed last night though, when he said he’d been lucky. Lucky??!! WRONG, Norman. Don’t talk like a jealous socialist! You’ve earned every penny!!

To have dinner with Norman was like finding a stray Dodo wandering around Hyde Park. We hid him closely, as I’m sure that thousands of The Slovenlies are following him around wanting to poach him to analyse every detail of his professionalism. “We can’t have people doing things properly, they will expose our mediocrity!!”.

So anyway, Blog, just in case everything I used to bother to say, might have, in fact, been correct, here’s some photos showing how Norman does his whiteboards. Norm, they don’t make them like you anymore. You’re the Last of The Mohicans. Take a bow, and enjoy a well earned retirement, Sir.

 

Hang on. Is this a knighting, Blog?

I think so.

Norman, step forward.

For services to bookmaking and smearing professionalism into the eyes of the mediocre:

Norman Mander = Not-Staff.

Over and out, B x

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BEN’S BLOGS 2014 NOW IN HARDBACK !!!

Regular readers might like to know Ben’s Blogs 2014 have been collated into a hardback volume which is available now.

All his blogs from 2014 in a 200 page book (right) including thoughts on betting, Cheltenham, Royal Ascot, the World Cup, politics, restaurants and current affairs.

As usual – never sitting on the fence !!

Available for £15 (+ P&P) direct from the publishers.

BONUS:
USE CODE ‘FLASHY15’ on checking out and get 25% OFF (valid until 8 January 2015)

TO ORDER:
http://www.lulu.com/shop/ben-keith/bens-blogs-2014/hardcover/product-21960270.html